Blog
Before You Try to Change Them, Look in the Mirror
Who are you trying to fix?
Your spouse? Your employee? Your business partner? Your child? Someone on your leadership team?
Receiving The Help: Life Is A Team Sport
What if the help you've been asking for has already arrived, but you haven't fully received it?
There are moments in life when we finally recognize that something isn't working.
The problem is bigger than we thought.
The burden is heavier than we anticipated.
The decision is more complicated.
The relationship needs attention.
The responsibility has exceeded our present capacity.
Recognizing that we need help is an important first step. Asking for help requires another level of humility and courage.
What Are You Asking For?
What opportunity, resource, relationship, or breakthrough might be on the other side of simply asking?
Last week, we explored an important leadership principle: recognizing when you need help.
But recognition is only the beginning.
You can know you need help and still refuse to ask for it.
You can recognize that you don't have the answer and continue struggling alone.
You can even pray for help while resisting the very people God may be positioning around you to provide it.
At some point, recognizing the need for help requires us to do something that can be surprisingly difficult:
Ask.
Recognize When You Need Help
What if one of the strongest things you could do as a leader is recognize that you need help?
Leaders are accustomed to being the people others depend on.
We solve problems.
We make decisions.
We carry responsibility.
We help other people navigate difficult seasons.
But when you've spent much of your life being strong for others, it can become surprisingly difficult to recognize when something has become too heavy for you to carry alone…
You Can Be a Strong Leader and Still Be Human
There are seasons in leadership when everything looks fine from the outside.
You're still showing up. Still making decisions. Still carrying responsibility.
But internally, you're struggling…
The Leader in the Mirror
Over the past week, I've been completing continuing education courses as part of renewing my California LMFT license.
One of the courses prompted an insight I didn't expect.
Not about my clients.
About myself.
As I reflected on what I was learning, I was reminded of one of the most important principles in helping people navigate change: empathy.
The Leader You Can't See
One of the questions people occasionally ask me is,
"Do therapists have therapists?"
The answer surprises some people.
Yes.
In fact, when I was working toward becoming a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, every hour I invested in my own therapy counted as three hours toward the 3,000 supervised hours required for licensure.
At the time, that sounded like an incredible incentive.
Looking back, I realized the greatest benefit wasn't accumulating hours more quickly.
It was gaining greater self-awareness.
Leadership Is the Lifelong Pursuit of Becoming an Integrated Person
Nearly two years ago, I sat in the front row as my parents renewed their wedding vows to celebrate fifty years of marriage. As I recently looked back through those photos, I saw much more than a celebration. I saw a lifetime of faith, intentionality, grace, and perseverance. It reminded me that some of life's greatest leadership lessons are lived long before they're ever taught.
When I looked at those photos, I wasn't thinking about fifty years of perfection.
I was thinking about fifty years of intentional choices…
Wealth Can’t Protect Your Marriage - But Your Marriage Can Protect Your Wealth
You’ve worked hard to build the life, wealth, and success you enjoy.
You’ve invested in your business, your leadership, your ministry, and your future.
But here’s the overlooked truth most wealthy Christian couples eventually face:
**Wealth cannot protect your marriage.
Balancing Emotional and Mental Labor: A Guide for Healthy Partnerships
Marriage is often described as a partnership—two people working together toward shared dreams, commitments, and responsibilities. But for many couples, the reality looks a little different. Instead of evenly splitting the responsibilities, one spouse often ends up carrying what’s known as the mental load…
Mind Over Media: How to Stay Informed and Mentally Well
In today’s fast-paced world, the news is always at our fingertips—on our phones, televisions, and social feeds. While staying informed is a critical part of being a responsible citizen, especially in an election year or during periods of social unrest, consuming too much news, especially emotionally charged or distressing content - can significantly impact our mental health. So how do we stay aware without becoming overwhelmed?
Back to the Present: Grounding Tools for a Calm Mind
Andre stood at the edge of the water, eyes closed, taking in the slow rhythm of his breath and the warmth of the sun on his skin. For years, he had battled with the silent grip of PTSD—a weight he carried from childhood trauma that often pulled him into panic, restlessness, or emotional shutdown.
But today was different…
Mind-Body Connection: Why Your Mental Health Matters for Your Physical Health
In today’s fast-paced world, it’s easy to compartmentalize our experiences, separating our mental struggles from our physical health. However, the mind and body are intricately connected. Mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, and chronic stress don't just exist in our minds; they often manifest physically…
The Cost of Caring: Combating Compassion Fatigue
In the world of helping professions—whether you are a therapist, nurse, doctor, social worker, first responder, educator or caregiver—your job is to serve, support, and heal. You show up daily, offering empathy, compassion, and guidance to those in need. But at what cost?…
Mindset Matters: Embracing Growth and Abundance in an Uncertain World
We live in a time of uncertainty—political divisions, economic instability, and social tensions seem to dominate the headlines. Inflation, job market shifts, and global conflicts create an environment of fear and anxiety. When faced with these challenges, it’s easy to fall into a scarcity mindset…
Loving Yourself Well: A Guide to Self-Care This Valentine’s Season
Loving Yourself Well: A Guide to Self-Care This Valentine’s Season
It’s that time of year again—store shelves are filled with stuffed animals, cards, and sweets, while jewelry ads flood our screens. Valentine’s Day is here, urging us to show our love through grand romantic gestures for the special people in our lives…
A Fresh Start: Practical Mental Health Resolutions for Lasting Change
The clock strikes midnight, and the weight of a fresh calendar year looms large. For some, this moment sparkles with opportunity—a clean slate ready to be filled with aspirations and dreams. But for others, the idea of making New Year’s resolutions feels overwhelming…
Unwrapping Calm: Strategies for Mental Well-being During The Holidays
The holiday season is often depicted as a time of joy, connection, and togetherness. Families gather around the dinner table, gifts are exchanged, and traditions bring a sense of nostalgia. But alongside the glittering lights and festive gatherings, many experience a quieter, less visible reality: stress, loneliness, grief, or mental health struggles. The dichotomy of celebration and emotional strain can make this time of year particularly challenging.
Optimize Your Impact, Income & Avoid Burnout: Strategies for Growing Your Private Pay Practice
Did you know that over 90% of therapists in private practice feel overwhelmed? It’s tough out there! I've been there, too.
With over fifteen years in the mental health field—working in diverse settings like rehabilitation programs, community mental health, government agencies, medical environments, and private practice—I know firsthand the demands of this profession…